Shitcasts on the boob tube...

Its been a few weeks since I started my job hunt. Since then, 24 hours have consistently been longer than they have been in quite some time. It reminds me of the idleness that overfilled my days 10 months back and pushed me into the blog world. A lot of people dealing with this phase (which W.T.F.Iceman aptly decribes as B.O.O.B.S. in his blog) turn to the idiot box. So I once again tried it against my wish and found nothing much has changed about the idiot box in 10 months. I'd like to make a mention of a few channels which I prefer to comfortably skip while surfing.

Family channels-For obvious reasons. I've been skipping them for as long as I remember and am absolutely clueless about what they show. A few discovered by W.T.F.Iceman can be read in his above mentioned blog.

MTV-MTV is one channel that sure as hell is making shit-loads of money with Roadies and Splitsvilla on every teenager's (and surprisingly a lot of adults') mind. I don't have any problems with the concept of these shows in particular, but I really don't get why are these seemingly the only shows on MTV. Turn on MTV at any hour and you will find one of these two. If not, check whats next and you will find them. Why the hell can't they play some quality music at other times? I'd suggest they change their name, cause it sure ain't music what they play.

News channels-These should seriously consider renaming the category itself. I even have a suggestion. They should collectively call themselves 'Abuse Channels' because they have literally been shamelessly abusing the very concept of news for several years now. All they do is pick up any and every miniscule scandal and use their expertise to exaggerate it, or just pick up any scandalizable enough event and make it look like a BEEEG SCANDAL. Apart from this, they also specialize in making opinion shows out of thin air. Just two days back I came across a show which was showing optional makeovers for political personalities suggested by some fashion designers and the public opinion on those makeovers. It was nauseating. WHY THE FUCK would I (or anyone for that matter) want to know what percentage of their retarded ignorant muthafuckin' viewers think of Sonia Gandhi's makeover. For all I care, they might want to see her in a see through bikini. So Fuck it!...AND FUCK THEM TOO }:-|

One common trait of all these channels is that these shows are repeated over and over as many times as possible so that the viewers can reproduce everything word by word even after a shot of horse tranquilizer. I am desperately waiting for the day when this putrid pile of shitshows will exhaust and the perpetual torture be put to and end. Till then, lets make do with NatGeo, Discovery and the movie channels.

In need of Defiance

I've always had a thing for movies based on true stories, and the kind of movies I've seen in the last two years during my MBA have only deepened my interest in them. The reason that these movies impress me so much is that they are based on actual events and are not the brainchild of a fiction author. This very fact makes them interesting for someone like me who doesn't like to read motivational books and prefers to be pragmatic. The last addition in this list was Daniel Craig's Defiance. I watched this movie when I was having a low day and the movie really set my mood rolling. The movie is about the Bielski brothers who lead a group of Jews taking shelter in the forests, making settlements in order to save them from Nazis during the second world war.

There is a lot we can learn from such movies. I'll list down a few things that I noticed in this movie.

1. A tinge of arrogance is unavoidable when you are leading a group not as strong as you, and time isn't on your side. At a point in the movie, Craig shows signs of slight arrogance which seems perfectly natural for a man given the circumstances.

2. Even great leaders are vulnerable to giving up. Towards the end of the movie, while being chased by Nazis, Craig gives up all hopes and is clueless about his next move.

3. The weakest of the people may emerge the strongest in the toughest times. When Craig gives up, his younger brother, who is shown emotionally weak earlier, emboldens him and saves the day.

Such movies invariably make me wonder when the Indian film industry will evolve to some quality cinema. I think the Indian audience is now ready for such movies but we hardly find them here in bollywood. I sometimes wonder if our movie makers are just incapable of it or is it that others are just too good. Well, I believe actions speak louder than words, and this is what they seem to be screaming. It is high time for our film industry to exhibit some 'defiance'.

Give me red...

The title reminds me of eveready battery ads that used to be telecasted on doordarshan when I was a kid. They used to be one of the most stylish ads of those times. But this blog is not about my nostalgia of eveready battery ads, it is about the 'Red rage' that has caught the Indian market lately.

A professor of marketing once mentioned in his pre lecture trivia that he has been noticing excessive red lately. He mentioned the increasing number of red cars on the road these days and also mentioned a store in Mumbai which only sells products that are red in color (which I found weird). A year later, I started to feel an excess of the colour red around me and his words echoed in my mind. I thought it was probably the effect of Vodafone paiting India red. After all, Vodafone and Airtel are undoubtedly the most noticed brands because of the number of hoardings and stickers they put up in all possible places. But these brands have always been red, so I kept musing until I noticed a trend that I assume is worth a mention here. A lot of brands have been turning red lately. UTI bank changed its name to Axis bank and turned its logo red. Kingfisher acquired Air Deccan and renamed the airline Kingfisher Red. India Post launched its new Red & yellow logo. Reliance Fresh has red as the base colour on its outlets. Reliance has been using green, blue, red and white for years. The new logo has the same colour scheme, but the background has been smartly turned red to increase the Redness. The UB group recently launched Romanov Red, a sub-premium vodka brand. A small red addition was the LG scarlet LCD TV series.

We all know that red is the most easily noticable colour and is usually associated with danger and sex appeal. but when I tried to find out the reason why marketers have this eternal love for red, I discovered that red enhances metabolism, increases respiration rate and raises blood pressure, which clearly explains the aforementioned associations.

The urban legend about The Coca Cola Company turning the green Santa red has been forgotten long ago. But with all the brands joining the Red bandwagon, I wonder what Indian folklorists will come up with. A secret society of marketers conspiring the color cues to trigger a consumption revolution...who knows...

Understanding Technology

I wrote my last management exam the day before. It was on strategic management of technology. I somehow managed to write an answer to some shitty question dealing with understanding technology. But that was in the books...in real life...I think technology is the most abused whore of this millenium...thats what I wanted to write...n I had even had thought of some examples to fetch extra points...

Digicams: The digitization of photography surely saved all of us a lot of bucks on the film rolls and positives, and a lot of time too. I've seen people shooting 5-6 stills for a single pose. I mean if you suck so much at photography, why don't you let someone else do it...why insult the camera. A mule can probably click a better picture in lesser attempts. They have also taken abstract photography to new heights. I frequently find pictures with weird angles and exposures and I have to sit and delete half of the photos before copying them to my hard drive. Thanks to more than half of the people of my generation who have taken up photography as an 'active' (rather hyperactive) hobby lately. And those misconceived bunch of fucks who either want to be in every single picture clicked in their presence or want a picture with anyone and everyone within a sixteen mile radius of the camera...it is like a dream come true for them. One picture with Tom, one with Dick and one with Harry...

Cellphones: These are undoubtedly the most useful invention of our time. No other technology has transformed our lives like these. And with cellphone prices and tarriffs going down by the hour, everyone owns a cellphone now. Some fucks use it like a call center employee and keep talking as much as they can...thanks to the free calls tarriff plans. But these fucks at least keep the use restricted to attending calls. There are these newly founds bunch of fucks who use their cellphone as a music players and they piss me off the most. Go to a quiet place around and you'll find someone flashing his cellphone light and the next moment a loud cacophony starts polluting the environment. These motherfuckers can spend a few grands on the cellphone, but they wont spend a penny on a headset...cuz they want to show the world that they have arrived. Now this brings me to the next citation...

Handsfree Headsets: Another appreciable invention which can be of tremendous help when it comes to multi-tasking. These are still on the road to commoditization, but are frequently abused by many of our fellow-earthlings. If you find some sane looking strangers lookin at you, talking to you like you have known each other since ages, don't be surprized. They are the prized possesors of one of the greatest inventions of mankind...a handsfree headset...and they are not talkin to you. Well...I can still take it with a pinch of salt if they are on call 24x7, but a few of these (especially the ones with bluetooth headsets) just keep them on like a life support system. Fucks like these should be turned into cyborgs and then their electromechanical parts should be short circuited.

I think I would have scored full points for this answer, how many would you gimme? :)