True Lies

Folks...Do not misread this blog as humour...this is some serious business :-|

I have identified three types of pathetic freaks. Allow me to explain in detail about them one by one...

Liars: These are the ones that have inherent need to lie. I am yet to figure out if this need is biogenic or psychogenic. They simply don't need a fuckin reasons to lie. For them, its a reason for their existence. The worst part of being the audience is that their lies are abso-fuckin-lutely ridiculous, but you cannot retaliate with disgust because that will give rise to an avalanche of even more ridiculous lies.

Bombastics: A subset of liars, these are the "been there, done that" kind. They claim to have done anything and everything in the world...as many times(if not more) than anyone around them. If you have survived a car accident, they must have survived a nuclear holocaust. They have been to every fuckin location in discussion, and that too more number of times than anyone who is a part of the discussion has. Be it sky diving, swimming with sharks, sleeping with a thousand women and what not...if anyone has mentioned doing anything...they have bloody well done it. Dare you doubt their achieving any of these feats...they will create supporting facts...even eyewitnesses, out of thin air...and by the time it gets over, you will realize you were fucking around with a pig in the mud.

Parasites: I couldn't have gotten a better description for the deadliest of the lot...Parasites. Dictionary defines the word as "a person who receives support, advantage, or the like, from another or others without giving any useful or proper return, as one who lives on the hospitality of others". I guess this clarifies what I intend to communicate, but I am not taking any chances. So read on...

These are disgusting creatures who encroach anything and everything that doesn't belong to them. Consider yourself lucky if you haven't come across one of these. They are so fuckin shameless that they will even scratch their balls with your hand without bothering to ask you...that too not because their hands are occupied...in fact, they might even engage both their hands in the act. They do it for the heck of doing it. Try pulling your hand back and they will return either an innocent "Dude! I was only scratching my balls" look or a shameless, unappologetic, unthankful smile, which will make you feel like ripping their balls off with your bare hands.

If you think you can survive the above three, wait till you come across a grandiose, parasitic, muthafuckin liar who will put all your emotions to test in one go.

And if you survive that too....then my dear friend...Welcome to the club!